This is a post that my roommate Anna and I decided to write together. It is a list of ways that we here in Mexico are forced to disregard the advice of our mothers on a regular basis...
Don't get in the car with strangers
Here in Mexico, there are vehicles referred to as colectivos, which are similar to buses and taxis. They run on routes like buses, but they are small like taxis. The objective is to fit as many people into it as possible, letting them off whenever they ask to get out. You may end up sitting on your neighbor's lap, even though you've never met them before.
Don't get on sketchy-looking buses
Here, anyone can be a bus driver, so they drive whatever bus they want. There are often times when you get on a bus and wonder if it is really a functioning bus, or if you just got onto a death trap careening away from the nearest junkyard. They make odd noises and sometimes the brakes don't work. But don't worry too much. There are plenty of fuzzy mirrors to break your fall should the bus brakes fail.
Don't drink the water
I believe there was even a song written about this statement. However, I didn't pack enough US water to survive for 5 months. Therefore, I drink it. So far I'm still alive.
Be polite and tell them to keep the change
Buses only take coins here. So, you are always on the hunt in large stores for things that will give you the largest amount of coin change back. You never tell someone to keep the change. You need the change to move around the city. However, this can be difficult because no one here wants to give you change. Everyone asks if you have change after you hand them your money. They do not seem to understand that you just gave them everything they needed to give you change back. This is one of life's greatest unsolved mysteries: how are you supposed to give them change if no one can give you change?
Don't go places you don't recognize/don't know how to get to
Since no one in Mexico, including the Mexicans, know where the buses are going, you pick out the one you think is going where you want to go and hope you are right. This was proven by our outing for tacos on Wednesday. After hopping on a bus that was supposed to go right where we needed it to go, it turned off to the right about two blocks into the journey. So, we quickly exited and walked to our destination instead.... Which leads to the next point:
Don't walk at night where there are no lights
This was also a part of Wednesday's adventure. We walked for probably 15 blocks at night with no lights down the side of an international highway. There aren't many streetlights here, so we just make do with what light we can find. Sometimes, there is no light, and we just hope there aren't any large cracks or missing pieces of sidewalk to trip us up.
Always obey all traffic rules
NO ONE here obeys traffic rules. Doesn't matter how big or small the car or bus is, no one follows traffic lights, lane lines, passing rules, one-way signs, merging rules, turn signal rules, personal space, or any other road rules. Lane lines either don't exist or no one uses them, so you can have six lanes of traffic going one way on a two-lane road.
Don't play Frogger with cars
Because of the aforementioned traffic chaos, playing Frogger within traffic is both life-threatening and adrenaline-producing. We will frequently sprint across traffic, attempting to beat the cars as they race down the road. Buses are especially impatient as we try to get across the many lanes of traffic.
Don't stand in the middle of the road
Our neighborhood is just up the road from one of the larger intersections in Oaxaca, and there are six or more lanes of traffic. If we are trying to get on another bus, we usually have to cross the street. Where we typically cross, there are five lanes, and we can't get across all five before the light changes. So we are often stuck standing in the middle of the intersection on a skinny concrete median as cars whip past, waiting on the light to change again so we can finish crossing.
Don't buy food from the back of a van
In our neighborhood, there is a guy who sells baked goods out of the back of his van. It's normal for people here to have small shops or sell things from carts or out of the back of a car, so we will frequently buy bread from him and not think anything about it.
Don't talk to strangers
Because we know almost no one here, we are always talking to strangers. We will often have people ask us where in the States we are from because they know we aren't from around here. Also, we four girls all live with each other, and we just met three weeks ago.
Bundle up in winter and wear shorts if it's hot
Here, it rarely gets below 80, which is pleasant, so bundling up for winter would make you too hot. As for wearing shorts, we learned the hard way that wearing shorts in public is a surefire way to label yourself a tourist and draw unwanted attention to yourself.
Don't eat bugs
One of the cultural delicacies here are called chapulines, which are fried grasshoppers. They eat bugs.
Only buy what you need for a few days. You can always but more next time. False. You can see something here one time and never see it again. So, if you see something that looks good or that you want, you better buy it then and buy a lot of it, in case it never shows up again.
Just go to Walmart. They have everything you need, and they will sell it to you. Nope. The Walmart here does NOT have everything you need, and sometimes they refuse to sell you something. Even if it has a price on the shelf. But if it is not in their system, it's not going home with you.
Always wear your seat belt
Unless you are in the front seat here, you don't wear a seat belt.
Don't put more people than there are seat belts in a car
If there is room to sit or lay on someone else, you can always fit one more person in the car.
Don't nickname people based on physical appearance
Here, if you look Chinese, they call you Chino. If you are dark skinned, they call you Negro. If you are overweight, you're called fat. If you are thin, you are called skinny.
Plan your day well and follow the schedule
We rarely, if ever, keep to the original schedule we call out in the morning because there's always something that will mess up or circumvent our plans, such as bloqueos (blockades) in the middle of the street
Always flush your toilet paper and never sit on a public toilet seat
No one here flushes toilet paper, and the public toilets typically do not have toilet seats, so you can't really get one of those awful communicable diseases you were always warned about. And public restrooms don't always have toilet paper, so we all carry a roll in our purses or backpacks.
Don't say words that you don't know what they mean
They speak a different language here. We're all the time saying things that we aren't really sure what they mean.
Always be on time
Being on time here means that if you say five, you show up at six, maybe six thirty.
If you don't know the answer to someone's questions, be polite and tell them the truth- that you don't know the answer
Here, if you ask a local where something is, and they don't know, they won't tell you. They will just give you directions like they know and send you on your way.
If someone gives you a compliment, acknowledge it and say thank you
Here, compliments usually consist of catcalls, whistles, or other relatively derogatory attention-getters, so we just ignore them.
No public displays of affection. Ever.
Here, there are always couples engaging in PDA, usually very heavily and in very public places.
You don't have to tip unless you're at a fancy restaurant
Here, you tip at restaurants, grocery stores, parking lots, and the guy who jumps on your car and washes your windshield at the red light..
If you get hurt, the fastest way to get help is to call 911
Here, you're better off walking to hospital on your broken leg, than trying to make a call and then possibly getting an ambulance to come get you. The phones we use have a thirty second message at the beginning of every call before it will go through, and the ambulances can't move through traffic any better than the regular citizens.
Don't eat too many tacos. It will make you sick
Here, we eat tacos quite often, and no one has gotten sick of them yet, mainly because they're so good.
Don't do anything to draw attention to yourself
We are white.
And there you have it. These are just a few things that we have found ourselves forced to do against our dear mothers' advice. So Mom, I offer my deepest apologies to you.
